Philadelphia Real Estate Helpful News and Views

Joke of the Day : Rabbi and the Southern Belle

There was a New York rabbi, whose son got a job transfer to Louisiana.

Two weeks later, the son called the father...joke of the day : rabbi and the southern belle

Son: Dad, I met a girl and we're gonna get married.

Dad: Son, you know what they say about those Southern Belles.
They can't cook, they can't clean house, don't make love, and she's
gonna call you Jew Boy for the rest of your life.

Son: I don't care. I love her and I'm going to marry her.

Two weeks later, the son called the father again.

Son: Dad, I married her!

Dad: What about all the things I warned you about?

Son : Dad, she cooks like a dream, she keeps the house spic-&-span and loves sex.

Dad: What about the last thing?

Son: We came to an understanding ..............

She doesn't call me Jew Boy, and I don't call her Schvartza.


sent in by Arnie and Marlene  residents of Delaire Landing
Author Unknown

Selling or Buying a Home is No Laughing Matter!

I get the job done with a smile and experience!   

HelpfulHannah Philadelphia Real Estate

Agent at Re/Max Eastern inc 215 953 8800

 215 820 3376 cell phone

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Pictures are by Hannah Williams not to be duplicated without permission .HelpfulHannahs.com is a Real Estate website please visit it if you are interested in information about homes or any information about the Philadelphia or Bucks County Pennsylvania area or call me direct 215-215 953 8818 or by cell 820-3376 i will be glad to assist you.Unless otherwise noted, the content, both written and in pictures,are the property of Hannah Williams. If you wish to use something you see here,( please ask for permission) Most likely I will oblige, with a link back to my original content as well as an acknowledgment. Thank you to all my friends,neighbors and clients who allowed my to use their photos and videos maybe you will get to Hollywood!


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7 comments • Hannah Williams • September 12 2011 04:19PM

Joke of the day: Slim Fast and Miracle Grow

One   evening a Husband, thinking he was being  funnyjoke of the day ;slim fast and miracle grow, said  to his wife, 'Perhaps we  should start washing your  clothes in 'Slim  Fast'. Maybe it would take a few  inches  off of your butt!'

His  wife was not  amused, and decided that she simply   couldn't let such a comment go   unrewarded.                   
The  next morning the husband took a  pair of underwear  out of his drawer. 'What  the Heck is this?' he said  to himself as a  little 'dust' cloud appeared when he  shook  them out. joke of the day ;slim fast and miracle grow

'April',  he  hollered into the bathroom, 'Why did you put  Talcum Powder in my  underwear?'  

She  replied with a snicker.  'It's not talcum powder;  it's 'Miracle  Grow'!!!!! 

  sent in by Marlene and Arnie residents of Delaire Landing

author unknown

 

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Pictures are by Hannah Williams not to be duplicated without permission .HelpfulHannahs.com is a Real Estate website please visit it if you are interested in information about homes or any information about the Philadelphia or Bucks County Pennsylvania area or call me direct 215-215 953 8818 or by cell 820-3376 i will be glad to assist you.Unless otherwise noted, the content, both written and in pictures,are the property of Hannah Williams. If you wish to use something you see here,( please ask for permission) Most likely I will oblige, with a link back to my original content as well as an acknowledgment. Thank you to all my friends,neighbors and clients who allowed my to use their photos and videos maybe you will get to Hollywood!


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7 comments • Hannah Williams • July 21 2011 08:11AM

Joke of the day : Choosing a wife

 

Choosing a wifejoke of the day: choosing a wife

A man wanted to get married. He was having trouble choosing a wife among three likely candidates. He gives each woman a present of $5,000 and watches to see what they do with the money.



The first does a total makeover. She goes to a fancy beauty salon, gets her hair done, new makeup; buys several new outfits and dresses up very nicely for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much.

The man was impressed.




The second goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much.



Again, the man is impressed.




The third invests the money in the stock market She earns several times the $5,000. She gives him back his $5,000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much.




Obviously, the man was impressed.




The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money he'd given her.



Then he chose the wife with the biggest boobs.



Men are like that, you know.
joke of the day: choosing a wife


And on another note!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.

Is this really funny ??? 

author unknown



 

 

 

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Pictures are by Hannah Williams not to be duplicated without permission .HelpfulHannahs.com is a Real Estate website please visit it if you are interested in information about homes or any information about the Philadelphia or Bucks County Pennsylvania area or call me direct 215-215 953 8818 or by cell 820-3376 i will be glad to assist you.Unless otherwise noted, the content, both written and in pictures,are the property of Hannah Williams. If you wish to use something you see here,( please ask for permission) Most likely I will oblige, with a link back to my original content as well as an acknowledgment. Thank you to all my friends,neighbors and clients who allowed my to use their photos and videos maybe you will get to Hollywood!


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11 comments • Hannah Williams • July 19 2011 12:55PM

Joke of the Day : Four Kids go to Church

Four LITTLE kids were concerned because

four little kids went to a churchthey couldn't get anyone to play with them
They decided it was because they had not been baptized and
didn't go to Sunday school


So they went to the nearest church. But, only the janitor was there.

One little boy said, "We need to be baptized because no one
will come out and play with us.
Will you baptize us?"

Sure," said the janitor.

He took them into the bathroom and dunked their little heads
in the toilet bowl, one at a time.
Then he said, "You are now baptized!"

When they got outside, one of them asked,
"'What religion do you think we are?"

The oldest one said, "We're not Kathlick,
because they pour the water on you."


"We're not Babtis,
because they dunk all of you in the water..."
"We're not Methdiss,
because they just sprinkle water on you."



The littlest one said, "Didn't you smell that water?"

They all joined in asking, 'Yeah! What do you think that means?'

  "I think it means we're Pisskopailians!"

sent in by Marlene and Arnie residents of Delaire Landing

four little kids went to a church

author unknown

 

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Pictures are by Hannah Williams not to be duplicated without permission .HelpfulHannahs.com is a Real Estate website please visit it if you are interested in information about homes or any information about the Philadelphia or Bucks County Pennsylvania area or call me direct 215-215 953 8818 or by cell 820-3376 i will be glad to assist you.Unless otherwise noted, the content, both written and in pictures,are the property of Hannah Williams. If you wish to use something you see here,( please ask for permission) Most likely I will oblige, with a link back to my original content as well as an acknowledgment. Thank you to all my friends,neighbors and clients who allowed my to use their photos and videos maybe you will get to Hollywood!


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7 comments • Hannah Williams • July 14 2011 08:29AM

Joke of the day : The Hormone Guide

The  Hormone Guide
Women will understand this!                                joke of the day : the hormone guide
Men should memorize it!

Every woman knows that there are days when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his hands! This is a handy guide that should be carried like a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, co-worker or significant other!


DANGEROUS


SAFER


SAFEST


ULTRA  SAFE


What's for
dinner?


Can I help you
with dinner?


Where would you like
to go for dinner?


Here, have some wine.


Are you
wearing that?


You sure
look good in brown!


WOW! Look at you!


Here, have some wine


What are you
so worked up about?


Could we be
overreacting?


Here's my paycheck.


Here, have some wine.


Should you be
eating that?


You know, there are
a lot of apples left.


Can I get you a piece
of chocolate with that?


Here, have some wine.


What did you
DO all day?


I hope you didn't
over-do it today.


I've always loved you
in that robe!


Here, have some wine.

sent by elaine                      author unknown

 

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Pictures are by Hannah Williams not to be duplicated without permission .HelpfulHannahs.com is a Real Estate website please visit it if you are interested in information about homes or any information about the Philadelphia or Bucks County Pennsylvania area or call me direct 215-215 953 8818 or by cell 820-3376 i will be glad to assist you.Unless otherwise noted, the content, both written and in pictures,are the property of Hannah Williams. If you wish to use something you see here,( please ask for permission) Most likely I will oblige, with a link back to my original content as well as an acknowledgment. Thank you to all my friends,neighbors and clients who allowed my to use their photos and videos maybe you will get to Hollywood!


To SEARCH for HOMES PLEASE VISIT HELPFULHANNAH,COM

 

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12 comments • Hannah Williams • April 10 2010 09:38AM